stupid.

I'm doing nothing to contribute to anything and I don't even know what I want to contribute to! I feel like a fucking failure doing nothing at all which in it's own seems like failing. I'm probably no better than these zombies around me. I'm maybe even less! I haven't done anything to truly be proud of and now I don't know what to do. My life is a mess. My room is a mess. My family is a mess! My perception of my society is a mess. My perception of myself is undecided, insecure and left at a loose end. My friendships are a mess because of my insecurities and because I think the people around me are dumb and the others are intimidating. ( 'cept jelly. ) I've exhausted all means of inspiration and motivation and all I can do right now to improve my life, I don't do because I don't even know what they are!